Yellowstone

So, you know how some people crave things like chocolate? Some people even get a hankering for a certain song that they just HAVE to hear. Me? I have some pretty strange cravings...One of which is a craving for nature.

So, I have been craving, CRAVING nature. Not just "outside". (Truth is, I don't love to be outside...it's hot, there are bugs, there are dogs, there are dogs...oh, I said that...well, that is what I hate the most about outside). But NATURE! The ocean. The mountains. The forest. That's what I crave.

So, to get my "fix", we went to Yellowstone. A perfect place for me to get some wild. :) My mom (who I love so much and whose company I love) came with Taiger and I and we had such a fun, relaxing time! It was wonderful!

We saw some elk...

One buffalo...

And TWO grizzly bears! (Here is the back side of one...great picture, right? Right?)

I even got a VIDEO of one of the bears! Not a bad video, considering we were being pursued by the forest ranger (who, I will admit, was doing nothing more than trying to protect the crazy tourists who were trying to get pictures of the bear....SOME getting annoyingly close to the big grizzly. I had a good zoom, so could stand at a safe distance and still get a good shot.)

We spent time relaxing at the Old Faithful Inn (THE BEST, most relaxing place!!)

Playing games...

Looking at the haunted rooms...

(Don't we look SCARED?!)

and watching Old Faithful. (If you look REAAAAALY close off to the left of the spray, you can see a rainbow! Lovely!)

It was fun, relaxing, and WONDERFUL!

Dealing with Racism and other Issues with Race

Two days ago, I was SO MAD! I posted how I felt, but not why. You ready to hear why I was mad? It isn't pretty, and it isn't easy to understand, and there is probably no fix...but here it is.

A few weeks ago, we attended a wedding where Taiger was the only African-American. He was dressed to the nines and looked mighty fine, I must say. :) (That has nothing to do with this story, just thought I would brag on him a bit :) ). Anyway, he was sitting by me and eating and he asked if he could go get some more lemonade and I said yes. To my other side was a family friend and his wife, who didn't know us as well. When Taiger left to get his Lemonade, the girl sitting next to me said, "Who is he??" I replied, "That is Taiger, my son!" (He was sitting by me, I was helping him eat, talking to him, being "motherly", but whatever...some people can miss those signs.) Her reaction was odd, but I understand it. Sometimes people are totally caught off guard by the fact that a "BLACK" child could be my son. I usually just get over it and let it go, but I am starting to get annoyed by such reactions. I was so thankful Taiger didn't hear her question or see her reaction.

A few days after that wedding, the groom told me that during the wedding someone had asked his bride where they had hired Taiger.

Yep. HIRED. My 5 year old son.

He wasn't helping serve. He wasn't helping clean up. He wasn't decorating or entertaining or doing ANYTHING that would suggest he had been hired. (Even if he HAD been helping out, why on earth would you assume this small child had been hired?! Wouldn't you think he was just a relative or friend helping out? And if they DID think he was there working, shouldn't they have called Social Services?!??!?!) I am going to strike a sensitive chord here, and some may not like it, but I am going to say it. The only reason I can imagine they thought he was hired is because he is black.

OUCH.

The other night, a woman was at our house and made a comment about how people who are not "white" don't look human. She specifically mentioned Chinese people and African people.

(I have a sister who is Chinese and a son who is African. She knows that. Very, very well. How am I sure she knows? This woman is related. Closely.)

I am always slow to react, slow to realize the meaning behind the comments being made. But once I realize, I am stunned! I don't know what to do! My FIRST reaction is to lash out! To PROTECT my son and his feelings!

Taiger is very sensitive about his race, his colour, his hair. He wishes, WISHES, he could have white skin like "mommy's", straight, blond hair like mommy's. It pains me so deeply.

Later, I was getting Taiger's hair ready for bed. Another relative (another woman) had come over a few minutes before, and when she saw us she asked what we were doing. I explained briefly that Taiger's hair gets tangled at night and so we have to put it up before bed. I detangled it, worked in the coconut oil, and pulled it up into a quick "top knot" (ponytail for boys :))

When his hair was done, he went in to the living room to say goodnight to Grandma. That woman was sitting there and said, so RUDELY, and nearly SHOUTING, "What is up with his hair NOW?!" I said, "What?" She repeated, "What's up with his hair NOW?!" I tried to remain calm and said, "Like I said, we pull it up so it doesn't get tangled while he sleeps." I looked at his face when as I answered her RUDE question, and as he hugged Grandma his face changed. Tears were forming in his eyes, and he looked so, so sad.

I was so mad. SO MAD! These two women, sitting in my house mistreating my son, making him feel sad, making him hurt, making him feel there was something "wrong" with his hair, with HIM!

If you have children who are African/African-American (or Haitian, or from Belize, etc.), how do you deal with racism? How do you deal with racism from family?

Just to clarify

When I said, in my previous post, "I am glad I have a little of this..." , the "this" to which I was refering was my darling son, just so you all know. (I love him with all my might, and he makes me so super happy. :) )

Steaming Mad!!

I am SO MAD tonight.

Hopping mad.

Steaming mad.

(Not at anyone in my family, or anyone who reads this blog, just so you know. :) Lots of LOVE for everyone! hee hee.)

So mad i can't see straight.

So mad I can't even discuss it.

I am so thankful I have a little of this to turn my anger to peace and all of the "seeing red" into seeing unicorns with rainbows coming out of their hineys (I said it). (And my spell check won't leave me alone about "hineys"...Good grief! I have NO IDEA how to spell it!)

.

I love Taiger more than I could ever express.

Harry Potter (said in my BEST British accent)

"YAAAAaaaaauuuuuuhhhhhhhggggggg...."


Did you catch that?

That is what I said a few months ago. I threw my arms up into the air and jumped up and excitedly shouted...and then sat down and ended with a pathetic sort of groan.


Why? I had just seen the first trailer for the NEW Harry Potter movie! I was SO EXCITED when it ended with the release date...JULY 15! MY BIRTHDAY! That was where I shouted. And then I ended with a groan (not intentional, mind you, and all those in the room laughed at the strange turn of excitement) as I realized mid shout that I was SHOUTING with EXCITEMENT that Harry Potter was coming out on my thirtieth birthday.


Let me repeat that. I was EXCITED. That HARRY POTTER was coming out on my (THIRTIETH) BIRTHDAY.

How pathetic am I??

I realized at that joyful-painful moment, that I am VERY pathetic.

But I am still going to opening night tonight. :) Happy Birthday to ME (who will be dressed as Harmione Granger, to be sure.)!



This is me dressed as Harmione in 2009 on my way to see HP and the Half Blood Prince. No, I didn't go opening (I have NEVER been to an opening night of HP!!), but I still dressed up once I DID get to go see the movie! Hee hee. People thought I was nuts-o. Unfortunately, life has scrambled and changed and turned and twisted and I have no idea where my super-rad, home-put-together Harmione digs are, so I think tonight I will look like Harmione when she is NOT "at school" and is wearing her every-day attire. BUT...I have my hair braided today so when I take it out it will be all "Old School Harmione"...you know, poofy everywhere. :)





Yes, I did have a wand, too. (A chopstick made black with Sharp*ie marker. Classy.)

I am a DING-BAT!

I am a very smart girl. I am majoring in CHINESE, for Pete's sake! I love to learn and feel I am quite clever.

But I am also a complete, well, ding-bat.

I burn pancakes. Really, I do. I cannot make pancakes.

I am CONSTANTLY and consistently overcooking macaroni. I ALWAYS over cook it! To the point that the other day, Taiger was heading out to play and before he went out he said, "Mom, don't forget you are making macaroni." It isn't DANGEROUS...I never leave it there so long it could burn or be a danger...just long enough the noodles get nice and mushy. EW!

A few weeks ago, I did something that took the cake! I got out of the shower and was blow drying my hair when I combed through it and WHITE stuff came off on the comb! I was really puzzled, but kept blow drying. Then, I realized the top was getting dry, but was still all shiny and heavy. DUH! I had forgotten to rinse out the conditioner! Oh boy, did my family think I was crazy.

Well, several days later, I got out of the shower and combed through my hair and guess what? SUDS came off on the comb. This time I wasn't puzzled, I was in disbelief. At MYSELF! I had COMPLETELY forgotten to rinse the SHAMPOO out of my hair! And as if that isn't bad enough, I DID condition it after that, and had thus obviously failed to rinse the conditioner, too. OH BROTHER! My family had a GOOOOD laugh at that one.

Well, yesterday I was thinking, "Okay, I want to wear my Capri's, so I need to shave my legs." (Too much information? Get over it.) While in the shower I was thinking, "I need to shave my legs." Then, I thought to myself, "Nah, they are okay, and I don't really have time." I went back and forth a bit, then decided I did NOT have time and I should just get out of the shower. I went to my room and got dressed and was putting lotion on my legs and thought, "Huh! My legs are so smooth! I guess I really didn't need to stress about shaving them! I can't even TELL there is hair on them!" I went up and started blow drying my hair...and guess what? Greasy, heavy hair. yup. I had forgotten to rinse the conditioner AGAIN! By this time, I was running late to work and didn't have time to get back in the shower and rinse (as I had done the other times). So, I braided my disgusting hair (yuck!) and went to work.

Later at work, I was sitting at the desk and marveled again at how smooth my legs were. "I should worry less about shaving from now on! I can easily go a few days between shaves and still wear capris or skirts!" I was busy, so the thought left my mind.

That night, I had more time to think of my hairless legs. (I promise, I don't usually spend THIS MuCH TIME during a day thinking about my legs! This just shows how perplexed I was! Hairless legs! Who knew?!) And then it hit me. It was like a "flashback" scene from a "B" movie. Lights flashing, camera tilting slowly side to side, spinning vortex around my head...and I had this picture (flashes into black and white) of me SHAVING MY LEGS in the shower that morning! WHAT?!

So, I shaved my legs and didn't rinse the conditioner.

OH. MY. GOSH. Can I be any more of a DINGALING?!

Love

So many things going on right now.

So much stress.

So much turmoil.

So much confusion.

So much frustration.

So much sadness.

I was gone from Taiger for two days. When I got home, he did something he rarely does when I come home from a trip...he ran to me and THREW himself into my arms. It was my happiest moment.

Tonight, as I see him asleep in his bed across the room, my heart misses him still.

I love Taiger.

The Adventure!

Taiger's and my "Great Driggs/Victor Adventure" was spectacular. I couldn't have asked for a better time spent with Taiger! I don't have a digital camera anymore, but Taiger has his and LOVES taking pictures. He consideres himself quite the aspiring photographer, and I have to agree. So, I am going to use his pictures to show you our great adventure!

First, we drove to Victor and made our way to the golf course, where there were a to be the tethered hot air balloon rides. Unfortunately, the wind was too strong, so the rides were cancelled. I thought, "That is it! There is NOTHING to do the rest of the night. We are going home!" But when I told Taiger, he was so sad. And, to tell the truth, I was sad at the thought of leaving, too. I had been looking forward to a bit of adventure, not to mention some quality time with Mr. T. SO, we decided to stay. We got our lunchables, applesauces, plastic spoons and capri suns, and settled at a nice table on the balcony of the golf clubhouse. So, we probably weren't supposed to eat there unless we were eating the food they were selling, but oh well. We sat and talked and laughed and watched the sky turn pink with sunset.




Taiger took a picture of the flag inside the clubhouse.


Outside on the golf couse, the balloon owners said we could all come up closer for a better look.


Taiger worked long and hard to get this shot just how he wanted it.

One of the families who owned a balloon had taken it out of its case to get it ready for launch, when the winds picked up and they deemed it unsuitable weather for a launch. So, they folded the balloon back up and put it in its case. They had all the small children come sit on the case to smash it down into the case. The kids thought it was so fun! And the balloon owner said it was the flatest he had ever been able to get the balloon. :)

When we were done looking at the balloons and eating, we went to Driggs to "camp out" in the car to wait for the real balloon launch at dawn. When we arrived at the launch site, we saw a sign that said there was a rodeo ahead! We cruised down and Taiger attended his first rodeo! (I have been to one before, with my good friend, Shannon! HI SHANNON! Do you remember going to the rodeo?) It was absolutely fantastic and SO FUN! Taiger was again quite the photographer and went up to the fence to get the best shots. Unfortunately, they are a bit blurry, but he tried his hardest. :)

The next morning was the big launch! Aunt A and Uncle B drove up that morning to join us. The balloons were amazing and Taiger took some great pictures. It was beautiful and SO FUN!